I'm not going to pay for the unsavory actions of others, just as we on occasion have booked providers that were considered a waste of money, along the way we learned to see the signs and got better at weeding them out ahead of the disaster.
I don't operate under the assumption a new provider I intend to meet will be a disappointment. So i get she meets flakes who don't show or whatever-welcome to the cost of doing business. I will roll the dice with my $ to meet a new provider, I will not roll the dice with a deposit. In fact numerous sites warn against this. There are too many other wonderful options that do not require a deposit, but to each his own.