Wondering how many of your are here for the same reason I am

Honestly, I'd rather save the cash than visit AMPs as much as I do. But I have no sex life at home. The issues started after kid #1 was born and although I knew things would change, I didn't think I'd be able to count on one hand how many times the wife and I had sex in a year and still have fingers left over. When we decided to have kid #2, we had sex every day for a week and then she got pregnant. After that, nothing, nada, zilch. I think we had sex maybe three times last year with the last time being about five months ago and each time I have to initiate it.

I've tried having the talk with her but she'll ignore it or try to change the subject. She's obviously not comfortable talking about. Got to the point where I just wanted to say, "well, look, if you're not going to have sex with me, I'll get it elsewhere" but thankfully decided against it.

This past Christmas, I tried giving her the hint by getting her some nice sexy but classy lingerie. She hasn't even taken it out of the box yet.

I'm in my early 40s. I can't go the rest of my life like this. Outside of the lack of sex, she's a great wife and mother to our children. I often wonder what would happen if she found out I visit AMPs, but really, what does she expect me to do? Anyone else end up this hobby because of a similar situation?

I think probably everyone on here, started like that or are divorced and this is a better alternative than getting in a serious relationship and worrying about

I feel for you brother. I was in the same exact situation except for the kids, when we started dating we would have sex several times a day, then it went to several times a week, then a few times a month, and then a couple times a year. It makes you feel like is there something wrong with you and destroys your confidence. And when I tried talking to her it was like I was speaking a foreign language because it went in one ear and out the other. It got to the point where I had to end it because I don't believe in cheating. That is the worst thing to go through in a relationship. Now I'm scared to get close to someone because I feel like the same thing will happen. All I can tell you is to sit her down and seriously tell her that it is bothering you and making you feel like she isn't attracted to you anymore and that you need to work on it. I was engaged to the woman who did that to me and it sucks that I had to break it off just for that. I wish you luck brother

My experience with my wife is no the same so I am no sympathising, I can empathise though. We have arrangement that is probably what you'd like to have mit your wife, i.e. if you aren't going to fuck me (she does totally do it and we love it, but our schedules don't line up as often as I like to DATYO strangers lol) I'm going to go lick some stranger ok.

If she is a REAL PARTNER, then she will understand your position. If you are in your 40s, that is an extremely long time to never ever have sex again. A prison sentence for murdering a person might be a shorter time of celibacy! Imagine that. So have to think of your wife's position and her feelings, I don't know her of course, but come to issue from an angle of respect. Does she respect you as a human being? You are a man with bodily function, period. And so is she. Having children, nearing the special time in woman's life, getting fat or ugly or old, these are all things that make woman no want to get fucked or licked all the time, but for us, we don't stop wanting to lick pussies and stick our thing inside various holes in things. My grandfather was mongering the day before he died, at 88 years old lol

Is no an easy thing to talk about with wife. She might be offended, or even worse, feel like less of a woman for putting you in this position, but still having no way to fix problem. But for her, easy thing to do is to be realistic and face this reality, as my wife has done. If it helps you, we have settled on three specific rules which work perfectly for me and for her. One, don't bring home girlfriend: AMP works perfectly for this, I go lick and sniff girl and then come home, and there is no girlfriend issue (I highly recommend you stick to AMPs and maybe indy, and focus on reason for the mission, don't get involved in these girls in any way). Two, don't bring home baby: I got vasectomy after our fifth child, as part of our agreement, so there is no possibility that I bring home baby. Third, don't bring home disease: I take test monthly and I am very cautious in my choices of activity (not to say I don't bareback ladies or whatever, I'm just choosey and I always sniff before I go in!). There used to be a fourth rule when our children were still in the home, and that was that I couldn't monger within 50 miles of our home, so I might no accidentally creampie their swim coach or trumpet teacher or scoutmistress or whatever, but this rule has now been deleted.

I promised to follow these rules, and it has worked out perfectly. For us, the last part of the agreement is that 100% and without fail, I tell her about the event before and after. No secret, no detail left out. Even last summer when I actually DID kind of start falling for an AMP girl, I told my wife every step of the way, and we talked it out like any other temptation we might have. She totally enjoys and gets off on hearing about the adventures, she even has an account here and lurks reading my and others' stories.

I know it seems impossible, but have to be realistic. Like you said, you have frustration looking down the barrel of a 30+ year sentence of celibacy, with someone who is a good wife and mother and homemaker! She might even be frustrated that she cannot (for social, mental, or physical reason) that she cannot complete her marital oath and obligations. If cannot talk with her, is in a serious way that you have to consider if she is indeed a full partner in the marriage or no. Of course, government divorce regulation means you are permanently trapped anyway. The entire universe opens at least if you talk and are honest and serious. Cannot get permission to fuck AMP girls without asking about it. Being in secret is a danger every minute for the rest of your life! I hear about my pals doing all kinds of undercover magic to keep their hobby a secret, while I text my wife on the way to the spa, and I laugh at those dingdongs for not being honest with themselves and their supposed "life partner".

Best of luck dude, it can't be easy!

Did you witness it in real time?

lol no but I took him to an AMP for his birthday earlier that year and he creampied a young Chinese spinner in her dirty mouth. He's a hero and the greatest man to have ever lived too lol, my personal idol and mentor!

Did he ask for it or you offered him?

hah he took me to my first AMP when I was no old enough to be in an AMP, and was my wingman slash I was his wingman in the hobby for almost two decades! He did not ask for that particular visit, he had kind of trimmed back his visits by that point, but gave me a pretty hard slap on the back when I picked him up and told him we were going to the shop before the steak dinner I was taking him to. I was chatting the MMS while he was in there, and I had all my fingers and toes crossed that I hadn't accidentally sent him to his death in there from like a heart attack or something lol

That's fucking awesome. I would have done anything to take my grandfather to a amp.

It’s a common tale. There are biological reasons for women losing interest in sex. For the “lucky” guys their libido also falls with hers. But usually she is done long before he is.

@Micawber - My situation is/was very similar. Except that the trigger for my wife stopping sex was menopause. But, even before that, our sex life had been on the decline for many years. I was not ready to be a monk. No way I could have made it without The Hobby.

Same as everyone else - My wife of almost 20yrs is 60+ and mostly sick, tired, crabby or something. Last time we tried, her head game used to be better and now it's mostly 2 minutes than lay back. I suggested some lube (she's 60+ !) and she tells me she's fine, just get my dick harder. We usually end up masturbating ourselves, I'll help her, but it's like pulling teeth for her to put her hand on my nuts or something. If I wanted to nut on my own, I'd at least watch porn. But I stopped doing that because it was interfering when I started hobbying, couldn't or took forever to get off etc...

AMPs are just easier. Git -r done. I'll go about once a month or every 3 weeks, (i'm 60+) no porn or doing myself. Even if an amp girl does HJ, it's still better than my own hand. Before ( stopped watching porn) I'd have to finish myself, but at least had help and assist to clean up and getting dressed etc... was sexy in its own way.

But NOT telling her. What she doesn't know won't hurt her. If I ever get found out, it's a massage with HE from a stranger. Her main concern would be how much I was spending. I'd probably make up something about half of what i was really doing.

Bottom line is physical contact with a woman is important, not doing myself with porn is easy and convenient, I'd rather have sex (of any sort) with a woman than myself any day.

You don't have to tell her. It is her fault you are fucking around, but women will never admit this.

If a husband is unemployed and sitting around watching TV all day, she'd still blame you. It is HER job to cook and provide pussy. If she failed then you gotta eat elsewhere.

I saw on YT a man interview women in Japan and asked them how would you feel if your BF went behind their back and had sex with another woman. Most, not all,

said they didn't view it as cheating just as long as the BF did not love the other woman.

Females and males need to come to terms with reality and maybe even reconsider what these words mean, like "marriage" and "committment" and "oath" and "devoted" and "cheating". They may not mean the same things when you are 20 as when you are 30, 40, 50, 60, and is possible they don't mean same to the male as the female either. My wife 100% is on board with this concept that eating out a stranger is no cheating, for us, that would be like if I brought a stranger to our home and began letting her cook dinner and we were kissing in my wife's bed. For us, what I do in the hobby solo is nothing more than when she goes to the spa to get her nails painted or we take the car to get inspection. I really suspect that most wives have a duplicitous view of all the above terms, what they want them to mean, and what they actually execute. She SAYS she wants you to be faithful, but in reality the execution of that is that she doesn't fuck you AND doesn't want anyone else to either. That's selfish and is a direct violation of any oath she may have in her mind or in reality. These are the foundational things to discuss with wife when the sex stops.

didnt notice till now that my whole reply did not go threw. To finish it was afraid of losing half again. Sorry guys

I'm sorry but discussing this activity with woman and then having her read your conversations w other guys discussing guy things is really weak in the guy code department. I am sure if I met these people they would be fine and we could all be some drinking buddies... however. To me and most guys here, especially guys exchanging messages or replying to messages or posts from that dude.....they would not want them shared with your SO. Anonymously or not. This website is a little bit of a boys club. Some dude admitting that he not only told his wife he's in the club, but then gave her the secret passcode and leaves the window crack2d so she can listen in while the club is in session... just fucking strikes me the wrong way.

I think there is so much humor in the irony of this site and the extremes that it's pure entertainment. However. There are just some things I wouldn't say in front of a woman...

Not only are u including this woman in the conversation but you are outing every single place listed here to someone that will undoubtedly share that private information with a growing army of women who will share it with others and so on amd so on and so on. Line the shampoo commercial..

I'm stoked for you if you and your wife have that agreement. But I don't think many dudes w want to share insane stories or personally embarrassing moments with your wife. Even if you have earned people's trust.


But hey. That's me.

sorry but she seems like a lost cause, I wasted many years myself, good luck, only you can decide your future