Divorce

Honda · Jun 5, 2020

Mr. Honda, I'm sorry to read about what's been going on in your life. Things have not gotten better, unfortunately.

At this point I would not say anything to her. Because whatever you say will be met with indifference or perhaps even some cruel kind of amusement. Accept that it's over. You have been engaging in this hobby for some time and at some point not given your ex enough attention/sex that she needed.

There will be pain for some time but perhaps by next spring or summer you'll see that the sun is shining and you'll feel confident and/or ready to start pursuing and dating someone new. If that is not the case then treat yourself to a spa girl once a week if you can afford it! Good luck sir and please continue to keep us posted on your situation!

Thank You TONY88. But right now I don’t ever want a relationship again. It’s going to be Spa girls , escorts no drama!!!!!

TONY88 · Jun 5, 2020

That sounds fine to me, Mr. Honda! Make yourself happy and enjoy yourself!!!

POINDEX1 · Jun 5, 2020

Tony speaks the truth. Be as sweet as pie to her. Don't lose your temper. As soon as this is all over thats when you treat her like a cunt

Bricktop · Jun 5, 2020

Honda said:

Just a little update. I had hope that she would come around and decide to go to marriage counseling. That got shut down this past Sunday. We talked and she told me she was done with the marriage and I came to terms with that. Fast forward you Monday, I jump in small car to not waste so much gas(my other car is a Suburban)to go to work. She had used it the day before. I need a tissue and look in the center armrest and find a travel size deodorant. I think that’s odd, why would she have one in there. Fast forward to Thursday morning. She has been working from home and we have a desk set up with her laptop and monitor in the living room. I just pass by it and notice something about marriage on a scrap of paper. She works with health insurance so I figure that has something to do with it. I take a look at some of her other paperwork and find one with some work stuff on one side X’d out and on the other a list. It’s dated 5/28/20. A date she want to her best friends house for a graduation. But the list had a title on top stateing lunch and the list want like this
Razor
Condoms
Vodka/pineapple juice
Favorite T-shirt
We never used condoms so she’s been seeing someone while we go toward this divorce. I’ve been respectful so far. Should I say something to her?

Keep your powder dry.

mitchxy1 · Jun 5, 2020

Honda said:

I had a neighbor once who had weight loss surgery. I didn't recognize her at first it was so drastic. She must have lost close to 100 lbs. Looked great. But I think a year later she gained most of it back. Remember, she somehow got that way in the first place, and she will again. Clearly she didn't have discipline, which will affect her in other ways. Console yourself with that.

jim_hatez · Jun 6, 2020

Honda said:

This sounds like someone who is mad/hurt. Relationships can be fun. Not all are drama 24/7. If it is, learn to cut loose sooner. I had that problem too. Held on too long when shit went south. We as men have to be more assertive when it comes to breaking up when it's not working for us. Too many guys stay in despite a million problems because they don't think they can do better or think it's too much effort. Sure finding a great woman that likes you is not simple for most dudes. But it can happen. The key I think is to learn that marriage is not the way to go. Esp for someone who doesn't want kids. F that. Sure there are some financial advantages, but I don't view them as enough to be worth it. In sum... dating/girlfriend good... marriage not so much. Unless you find an eligible woman who ticks all the boxes and is stupid loaded. Go for it, lol. Otherwise... once and done. You know what they say about insanity.......

Drantanborg · Apr 8, 2024

Hey, I can imagine how difficult this situation must be for you. Dealing with trust issues and feeling disconnected in a marriage can be really challenging. From my own experience, sometimes it's best to prioritize your own well-being and consider what's best for both of you. If you're considering divorce, it's important to seek guidance and support.

J Carson · Apr 11, 2024

Honda said:

How about an update all these years later.

Honda · Apr 11, 2024

J Carson said:

You wanted it so here we go. I’ve to date, but I’ve been out of the scene for over 20 years. I can’t get used to the online thing. I’m old school. I know I’m going to get crushed for this. But I’ve been on dinner dates with a provider who’s been reviewed here, I really enjoy her company outside of her job. I know I’m falling for her. I know guys I know. I’m just asking for trouble. But I’m going to enjoy this ride while it last.

jim_hatez · Apr 11, 2024

Honda said:

FYI I silently edited your post to fix the /quote just to make it more readable. In case you are wondering you aren't nuts lol. Meant to add a note but I clicked the wrong button.

Best of luck man! You gotta do you. If you are having a good time it's all that matters. Doubt you need a lecture from me or anyone else. As long as your eyes are wide open, have a blast. Or two, lol.

BIGBOB62 · Apr 11, 2024

Honda said:

Despite what most guys here say, I've seen it done successfully many times now. So just ignore the racket and have fun.

이 회장님 · Apr 11, 2024

Honda said:

You summed it up perfectly—enjoy this ride while it lasts. Have fun and if your gut tells you it’s time to move on, then you move on. Have fun!!

markkennedy · Apr 11, 2024

Honda said:

Good for you. Is no law that says you have to be married, if you find you didn't succeed in marriage, then move along and enjoy. Is your life, no your wife or ours. If I say that you're crazy for dating a provider, ok you should listen and hear advice to follow, but is still your life. Is no trouble with spa girl, if you 100% go into it with correct expectations set. If you are going into it with the absolute mission of getting remarried, yea you are totally in for a terrible day in the future. If you go into it with "it's my life and I'm living it and I see where the adventure goes", then you will enjoy every day till you die. Lots of us have dated provider and we're all still alive. Enjoy it, have fun, be nice, and pull the parachute when it gets more intense and you are no enjoying. Are ~2b eligible females in the world. On to the next, right?

J Carson · Apr 11, 2024

Honda said:

You wanted it so here we go. I’ve to date, but I’ve been out of the scene for over 20 years. I can’t get used to the online thing. I’m old school. I know I’m going to get crushed for this. But I’ve been on dinner dates with a provider who’s been reviewed here, I really enjoy her company outside of her job. I know I’m falling for her. I know guys I know. I’m just asking for trouble. But I’m going to enjoy this ride while it last.

I take it you got divorced. You cut the old lady loose?

Honda · Apr 12, 2024

J Carson said:

Yes actually she cut my loose.

mitchxy1 · Apr 12, 2024

Honda said:

I reread your OP.
I think the divorce was inevitable considering what you wrote. Now that it's over, I hope there were lessons learned for both of you. I hope you're not devastated by it; sometimes you're just not with the right person, and fighting for it doesn't make it right. Then you just end up wasting time, which is more valuable. You'll find someone else, and if not, it's still better than being in a toxic relationship where it just eats both of you up. My parents never got along and eventually they just barely spoke to each other which I suppose is better than constant arguing. I'm of the belief that marriage is not a natural thing. Putting males and females together under one roof every day for the rest of your life doesn't make sense since we're so different. So it's a constant work in progress. Marriage IMHO is mainly just for starting a family.
You're better off now and hopefully a better man for it from what you've learned. Whatever you do now, you're better prepared. But being with a provider IS risky!

Drantanborg · Apr 15, 2024

Drantanborg said:

This guide at https://divorcejury.com/divorcing-a-disabled-spouse-what-you-need-to-know could provide some helpful insights. Take care of yourself and make decisions that feel right for you.

Divorce

Registered Member

Messages: 67

Joined Nov 27, 2018

Registered Member

Messages: 345

Joined Apr 30, 2019

Registered Member

Messages: 80

Joined Apr 12, 2019

Review Contributor

Messages: 1,428

Joined Jul 9, 2019

Review Contributor

Messages: 425

Joined Sep 16, 2018

Moderator

Messages: 1,907

Joined Jul 30, 2018

Registered Member

Messages: 34

Joined Jan 23, 2023

Review Contributor

Messages: 21

Joined Oct 27, 2019

Registered Member

Messages: 67

Joined Nov 27, 2018

Moderator

Messages: 1,907

Joined Jul 30, 2018

Review Contributor

Messages: 1,178

Joined Oct 17, 2020

Review Contributor

Messages: 5,265

Joined May 22, 2020

BFE to your GFE

Messages: 1,440

Joined May 13, 2023

Review Contributor

Messages: 21

Joined Oct 27, 2019

Registered Member

Messages: 67

Joined Nov 27, 2018

Review Contributor

Messages: 425

Joined Sep 16, 2018

Registered Member

Messages: 34

Joined Jan 23, 2023